5 Reasons I am PISSED at snow...

1)  Kills my good shoes…Unless you wear GOOFY shoes or boots you wear your good work shoes because you think you are impervious, but 3 weeks later your Brooks Brother tassled loafers look like Jed Clampetts shoes

2) Shoveling-  Yeah I know ..You have 5 kids  why don’t they shovel…Sure and I’ll convince Angelina Jolie to go to Cancun with me.

3)  Cuts down on drinking time…Every man’s dream, or at least the ones I know  want to spend 1 day a year in a Irish Pub next to a fire getting crushed beyond recognition ( Make sure DYLAN THOMAS isn’t there please)  But realistically between kids, wife, shoveling, sleighriding (ouch), you have 17 minutes of drinking time in Tipperary from 10:17 to 10:34…

4) Bad Mood-   Snow causes the following things to hate you..Wife, Kids, Relatives, Dogs, Store owners, etc.  Especially the wife who doesnt like you anyway, but when your hanging around  with a 5 oc’lock shadow, bad mood, no good sports on TV, and freinds in the same boat, and you try chasing her around the house..Then the hate intensifies like the winds of a great Nor’Easter…

5)   Did I mention that it cuts down on drinking time ?

And that’s why I hate SNOW….

[Via http://51andpissed.wordpress.com]

Added to Life's Indignities...

…was at the gym, attempting to whip my a$$ in shape…normally, I avoid looking in the mirror, for obvious reasons…today I glanced over…WTH? Why are Madonna’s veiny, bony hands attached to my body?

And, if I have to have those hands of hers, why can’t I have the rest of her ridiculously toned body too??

But then I would have to have this face…

at the Hope for Haiti telethon

Did everyone see her during the telethon?  She looked like she’d been pumped full of face fillers.  I wonder if she had had the stuff injected, thinking she would have some time for the swelling to diminish but then the Haiti telethon popped up and she *had* to be seen??  B/c her face was a puffed-up wreck.  I mean that with all love and kisses for Madonna, of course.

Back to the bony claws that now hang from my arms…sigh…not much I can do about it…and, to be honest, they are the very least of my problems right now.  But, c’mon!?!? Why does it all have to be going down the shitter??  At least my eyelashes still rock (yes, they are the only part of me that’s making me happy right now! How sad?!?)

[Via http://kellybexblog.wordpress.com]

Listen Up {Take The Time To Dance}

I’ve posted before about how much I love to dance, especially in my kitchen while preparing dinner. I think any good weekend needs to start off with a little bit of dancing around the house. I like to go home from work, kick off my shoes and put on some comfy pants and dance around as I straighten up the house a bit. It always gets my weekend started off on the right note.

Here are some of my favorite songs to dance around too.

One thing to note: these aren’t really dance songs. I really prefer to dance to songs that are a little more musically interesting, rather than those that are set up specifically so that any Tom, Dick or Harry can dance to them. That’s not to say that more traditional dance or club songs can’t be fun, I just don’t own any of those songs, so you’ll never find me dancing to them in my house.

Okkervil River, “Unless It’s Kicks”

Phoenix, “Lisztomania”

Fiona Apple, “A Better Version of Me”

Spoon, “The Underdog”

Dirtie Blonde, “Walk Over Me”

The Arcade Fire, “Rebellion (Lies)”

Rilo Kiley, “Portions For Foxes”

Okay, every good dance session needs at least one total classic.

Madonna, “Like A Prayer”

[Via http://thingsiadore.wordpress.com]

Celebrity Lost And Found

My parents are moving (to a place with a pool!!!) and I’ve been helping them pack up. I found this old issue of Images (summer 2008) whilst clearing out the closets. It was our most celebrity packed issue ever — here’s a little behind-the scenes info on interviewing the stars:

Sandra Oh seven years before Grey’s Anatomy. We never met in person, but Ms. Oh couldn’t have been sweeter and even helped organize the photo shoot in L.A. (we were a low-budget magazine that always aimed high).

Ray of Light-era Madonna. As I recall, despite her then newfound obsessions with yoga and kabbalah, Ms. Madonna was quite pissy and got into a spat with Québecoise TV presenter Julie Snyder. Still, I was in the same room as Madonna!

Chloé-era Stella McCartney. Ms. McCartney was quite lovely, if not a little guarded. She said I reminded her of a bear, in a good way. I told her that I liked her shoes (the Nike Footscapes in the picture). She said, good luck finding a pair, they were for the Asian Market only. Little did she know that I was going to Singapore in a few months. They became my favourite shoes ever.

[Via http://graciousgood.wordpress.com]

Hunky Gerard BUTT-ler Flirts His Way Thru Brazil

According to the NY Post, my boyfriend, Gerard Butt-ler was spotted with a bevel of beauties last week at Rio de Janeiro’s famed winter Carnival.  And nope, I was not among them. (sigh)

But neither was Jennifer Aniston, who is reportedly having a steamy fling with my favorite actor.  And what’s worse, one of the Brazilian beauties was seen typing (what was believed to be) Gerry’s number into her cell!  Lucky biatch.

Of course, I should probably be more worried that he was seen partying at the Carnival with man-hungry, Madonna.  But, I’m not.  Madge typically prefers them much younger and more Brazilian.

[Via http://fresh1027.radio.com]

Villagers Kicked Out Over Madonna School!

“Malawi’s government has told a group of villagers they will have to move to make way for a $16.84 million girls’ school being built by pop star Madonna.” writes ninemsn.com.au

According to ninemsn the government in Malawi has asked a village to move in order to start building a school that has been donated by none other than Madonna! However, residents have refused to move just outside the capital city of Lilongwe. AFP Commisioner Kalemba said the villagers “were lucky to have been compensated for the houses, gardens and fruit trees.” Anjimile Mtila-Oponyo, who will be principal of Madonna’s school, said the singer paid the villagers more than 16 million kwacha (about $A130,000) to compensate them for their houses.

Headman Binson Chinkhota urged residents to move, saying the school would benefit their children. How can it benefit their children if they aren’t going to be living anywhere near the school, somehomw this still doesn’t put our minds at ease.

[Via http://haygeee.wordpress.com]

A Man That Fitted for the Queen So Long Alexander McQueen RIP

Amazing, nothing less. One of the most priceless designers of this generation and of all generations, 40 years young, Alexander McQueen the brilliant fashion designer too young to be gone so soon.

He was in the leagues of Eve Saint Lauren, Lagerfeld and Christian Dior. Celebs such as Madonna, Lady Gaga, Cameron Diaz and many others loved to wear his creative notions of costume and clothing.

Alexander already had a Paris couture house by the age of 26. The Queen of England names him a Commander of the British Empire and he designed several British royalty and costume wear for Prince Charles and other royal elites.

Still,  a bit more rebellious and humble,  McQueen Scoffed at most celebrity status and superficial notions of fame.  He bucked the trend and gave  Kate Moss runway work  when everyone else turned their back on her for her use of cocaine.  He did a show with  a woman on stage with prosthetic limbs that he designed himself for her to walk down the catwalk.

McQueen’s main clothing line eventually became owned partially by Gucci in which McQueen kept creative control.

He worked with Puma and started to have an international line with Target in March of 09.

Today I offer an ode to his death more in photos than a speculative life and death chronology that is already happening in the other press releases. Let us all celebrate this ingenious designs and visionary artistic wonders, this shy man who avoided the limelight but in which so highly deserved it! Here’s to you Alexandar….Yes you were fit for the Queen and her family was fitted by you…

cate Blanchett

[Via http://crimsonandchrome.com]

Couture Fashion Week is pleased to partner this season with FACE Atelier cosmetics

FACE Atelier is the official makeup sponsor of Madonna’s “Confessions” tour, and offers a complete line of superior quality cosmetics to bring out the best in every woman, beautiful in her own unique way. Look good, feel good, be kind to yourself, and celebrate who you are. The ideal FACE Atelier woman is you.

[Via http://couturefashionweek.wordpress.com]

Madonnas boyfriend spent his birthday alone in Brasil, time out?

Here can you see Madonnas boyfriend celebrating his birthday without her in Brasil. Madonna and her boyfriend have decided to have a time out according to Hola magasine. The news has spread worlwide, but so far none  has spoken.

Madonna is in New York  doing her new album, as Jesus showed himself recently at the Fashion Week in Brazil and on the beach in Rio de Janeiro. In the past month, she has gone out alone to dinner in the Big Apple with their children.
Thanks Madonna, the Brazilian model has managed to become increasingly popular on the catwalks, his name has gone around the world and his prestige has risen . He has also played as a DJ in various macro events, plus participate in a Madonna videoclip.

Misslopez Fashion Report

[Via http://misslopezplanet.wordpress.com]

Jesus quits Madonna...

Jesus Luz and Madonna are done and dusted.

For the love of… ( that would just be TOO much hey).

Maybe it was the picture of his crooked wanger i posted last week (HERE) that made them split up or the fact that there’s a 173 year age difference. Maybe he didn’t really like prune juice. Who knows…either way, the Mail Online reports that they have split up.

You know what. I really don’t give a rats ass whether they genuinely broke up or not, but here it is none-the-less. I do it for YOU….everything i do…i do it for you.There’s no love, like your love.

“Madonna is reported to have split from her ‘toy boy’ boyfriend Jesus Luz.

The Brazilian model is said to have ended the relationship with the 51-year-old star because of the 28-year age difference and their busy work schedules.

A source told the Chicago Sun-Times newspaper the split was initiated by 23-year-old Luz.” [mailonline]

Any bets on who’s next?

[Via http://mcsavage.wordpress.com]

With Samantha Harris out, who's in for this year's 'Dancing with the Stars?'

When I heard that Samantha Harris is leaving ‘Dancing with the Stars’ I thought, “Aw, that’s too bad. Who’s the celebrity she’s dancing with again? Oh. She’s the co-host? Oh.”

While I’m sure tens, if not twenties of fans might be devastated with the news, it’s also a perfect chance for me to bring out my “IF I WERE A NETWORK EXEC” game and tell you who I think should take over her model behind the mic duties. Here are my picks. Vote at the bottom of the page or add your own nominee.

1. The Big get: Paula Abdul.

Zap2it.com

As my column colleague, Elizabeth Snead at Zap2it.com, mentioned last week, the rumor mill has had her in talks since last year to sign on to the show. Yeah, I get it, she’s a dancer, and hosting/judging is on her resume. But have these suit monkeys bothered to tune in and watch her circling the drugged out drain towards Ozzy’s world? If they want to bring in a walking episode of ‘Intervention’(and who doesn’t love watching live trainwrecks?), then Paula wins this round.

2. The Impressive Get: Jennifer Lopez

Zap2it.com

She’s a trained dancer with a new cd and movie to promote. DWTS would love a boost in ratings and clout. What could be a better combo? Although J-Lo might see the move as slumming it, a hosting gig with DWTS is a chance to show her non-diva, I-was-a-fly-girl-once side that might just get her (and the show) more fans. Not to mention the fans who’ll be tuning in just to see what and who she’s wearing.

3. The Graduate Get: Marie Osmond

ABC

As one of DWTS’s most talked about contestants, her faint-felt-around-the world might be the ticket to a steady prime-time gig. She’s got the chops, the gams and enough time behind a mic to get camera ready tout suite. Now if only she can get time off from playing pitchman for NutriSystem and her Vegas act with brother Donny.

4. The Safe Get: Drew Lachey

Zap2it.com

He’s already filled in for Harris during her pregnancy, so this interview should be relatively easy. And as a another DWTS graduate and winner, Lachey has an edge on which deeply probing questions to ask in the ever-important backstage interview. Unfortunately for Lachey, the balance of gender powers would tilt heavily towards the testosterone side, even if some of those guys tilt the other way…

5. The Impossible Get: Madonna

Zap2it.com

We can dream can’t we? Who wouldn’t love watching Madge tell off Hasselhoff for not keeping his line straight? And if anyone gets remotely more popular than the Dancing Queen herself, we all get treated to a Madonna v. Celebrity dance off. Suh-Weet!

View This Poll
polls

[Via http://nathalienation.wordpress.com]

Madonna's Entourage

Dear Lilith Fair,

 

Shortly after moving to New York, I was swept off my feet by Madonna and her Sweet and Sticky Tour. I landed a position being the home school teacher for her personal trainer’s son. You know the woman with the elastic bands who also trained Gwenyth Paltrow? Well, that was who I worked for.

 

Along with packing Madonna’s ice packs, jumping on her mini trampoline before she warmed up for the show, and staying at Gwenyth Paltrow and Chris Martin’s house in the Hamptons, I saw the most unglamourous parts of the glamourous life. No one seemed happy. Everyone ate expensive food at fancy hotels. Everyone had work to do and no fun to be had. Everyone had to buy more things. Everyone had to inspect themselves in mirrors. Being part of the entourage’s entourage, I was always on my own at hotels no one else stayed at, stuck in a basement in Illinois, or a house in the middle of Indiana.

 

The only thing that saved me was my guitar. Luckily, because music was part of the home school curriculum, I was allowed to bring it with me. In a lonely hotel room in Los Angeles I wrote “Glitz and Glamour.”

 

 

“Glitz and Glamour” MP3 Download

[Via http://dearlilithfair2010.wordpress.com]